Admitting mistakes

(Referees are human, too)

No one is perfect and no one has ever refereed a perfect match.  Referees are human, too, but is it ever OK to admit a mistake?

We can’t get all the calls right all the time.  We make many major decisions and non-decisions as well as hundreds of minor decision during the course of a match.

We stand tall and stick out our chest and build up our courage and confidence, often a description given to young or inexperienced officials as to what they should do. Even if you’re wrong, but look confident, you’ll get less grief. If you are in position, they can’t complain long because you were there, or “presence lends conviction.”

Then, there are the six greatest words in the laws of the game, “in the opinion of the referee.” This can also lead to an unapproachable attitude.

The real education of new referees comes from the informal classroom, at association meetings, the ref tent and on the field of play.  As a young ref, you listened and soak up some of the horror stories and tricky situations experienced referees were in.  These are your real tools!  When you ref, you try some of them with success and some failure.  But, do you have the "I’m never wrong attitude?"

How do you deal with upset participants?  You learn to quickly filter out the noise and only react to the comments which require action.  Sometimes you have to laugh at the stupidity of their actions, comments or demands.  You are always the “worst referee they‘ve ever seen”

While I don’t think you should admit every mistake or go out of your way to say you’re sorry, you can be approachable and human rather than cold and unapproachable.    Next time you are questioned about a call, admit that you may have gotten it wrong.  This sometimes diffuses the anxiety of the situation and allows the player or coach to focus on the game.  It also allows you to get over the mistake and return to officiating. 

These admissions should be restricted in use to participants who deserve the interaction and respect, not a player who had been hounding you, because he will likely not settle down, but instead increase his agitation. 

I also wouldn’t recommend that practice over a major, game changing decision that can’t be corrected.  And I wouldn’t do it more than once or twice in a game.

Admission of a possible mistake can be an effective game management tool.  You will ultimately be respected for your honesty.  Be wary of the comment that might come out that you will correct it with another “intentional” mistake later.  Two wrongs don’t make a right.  You destroy your integrity and the game. 

You don’t even have to admit the mistake, just that it was “possible you didn’t get it right.”  You could just say, “maybe I missed it,” or “I was screened, man. I wasn’t sure,” or “I didn’t catch it.  I was watching another development.”

But be approachable.  Talk to players and coaches.  Treat them with respect and expect it back.  You may find that the occasional admission earns you more respect and game control than a stone, cold-faced approach.

Players are human, coaches are human, referees are human too.